Saturday, December 19, 2009
Chance & Broadcasters
I was on grandprix.com tonight doing some research for something (I've already forgot what it was, to be quite honest) and after I found out whatever information I originally went searching their archives for I got curious about what race it was that I first saw as an adult that got me obsessed with F1.
Once I pinpointed the race in question (French GP, Magny-Cours, July 21, 2002) I started thinking about the few people that really enjoy this blog all over the world and how the reason they come here is for my silly take on things. I'm not a news source. I'm not terribly technical. I am an opinionated American that some folks find amusing due to my semi-skewed take on Formula 1.
Once upon a time I was supposed to be an up and coming young F1 journalist years ago but apparently I was too old even at the time to win the Red Bull journalism prize (by 1 year) that I felt I needed to help get my career kick-started and at the same time I have yet to fulfill my Journalism/Mass Communications degree at the ripe old age of 28... So as you can see life got in the way and as of late I have forgot to update this blog as much as I should be doing. But in the end I sure do love to write about Formula 1 racing and the things that captivate and amuse me about the sport both new and old.
That is why this blog exists. That is the same reason there are only a handful of the many web pages devoted to F1 that are worth reading that DO serve as a news source. This blog exists to amuse, provoke some though and possibly educate. I don't break news. I'm not going to be able to explain very well why some teams were soiling themselves at the beginning of this past season over the double diffusers some other teams had. There are plenty of people who can do that well and plenty more people who aspire to.
Formula 1 at times can be kind of cold and soulless. I like to latch on to that bit of warmth that the sport does emit and discuss that aspect. With that said, I shall try to get back to my "roots" and tell more stories of how F1 has touched me as well as parody and lampoon the other aspects that I find absurd for the enjoyment of the few fine loyal readers I do have... starting this entry!
I learned 10 years ago as a young intern at Alternative Press magazine here in Cleveland that publishers don't get too excited over creative writing exercises involving humor concerning whatever subject it is that their publication "seriously" covers, but many readers can be and ARE entertained by such bits of nonsense. Who doesn't like entertainment?
With that said, I shall tell my eye-opening Formula 1 experience and elaborate on it a bit. I would greatly enjoy reading what your F1 eye-opener was.
The Tale:
It was early August in 2002. I had just arrived home from a 3 day trip to Peoria, Illinois and was kind of pissed off as a whole due to the person I was traveling with and the fact that we hit massive traffic delays about 50 miles south of arriving home which added an extra hour to an already long enough road trip. It was around midnight when I finally arrived home. My father was watching TV and drinking a glass of scotch as he often does. The old man was real excited because he'd found a channel that showed F1 races regularly.
Now, my dad has been a pretty devout follower of Formula 1 since the late 1960's when a buddy of his in college took him up to Watkins Glen for some racing action and evenings of drinking. He went to all the US GP's at The Glen from 1973 to 1980. In 1976 he first won tickets to the inaugural Long Beach Grand Prix from Formula Magazine. He had his father who worked at the local General Electric in Erie, PA make him up some "official" looking credentials that stated he was a Team Lotus photographer and was able to get into the paddock and on to the starting grid to take some amazing pictures of drivers and famous folk, on top of being able to get some great Super 8 film by hanging off of the barriers manned by a track marshal for drivers to enter through should they need to get past the catch-fencing and concrete barriers in the event of a failure or crash. Later that year he and my mother went to the race at Mosport In Canada. Then, in 1981 I was born. My birth caused him to have to give up wandering around the USA & Canada to watch F1 races. It also sadly caused him to have to quit racing in the SCCA's Formula Vee series. To make matters worse, my need for Pampers was so fierce that he had to sell his beautiful 1969 Lotus Europa which had aided him in the procurement of 3 SCCA Autocross championships in the mid-1970's. With my bottom covered in diapers with money received from selling relics of his youth he was still able to make it to two more GP's due to his employment with Phillip Morris. In 1982 and 1983 he scored some great tickets to the Grand Prix of Detroit, which sadly were the last races he has attended.
Since then he had always kept up with F1 via magazines and any races shown on TV. He named me after Niki Lauda and as a small child would try to educate me in the ways of F1. While I was too young to really understand I was always well aware of the names Stirling Moss, Jim Clark, Jackie Stewart, James Hunt, Emerson Fittipaldi, and of course Niki Lauda. I would play with his expensive small scale F1 replica cars and that was about it. I always had an appreciation and respect for the sport but due to it being hard to see in the states, never really started following it... until that fateful night in August of 2002 when the Speed Channel was replaying a recent race in the wee hours of the morning.
I remember just arriving back home and during a commercial my pops telling me how he was pretty sure a Michael Schumacher was about to surpass Juan Manuel Fangio's record of world championships that Schumi & Fangio up to that race currently shared. While my dad was familiar with the Schumacher name, I sure was not but this information was enough for me to at least sit down and watch the last half of the race. I found it interesting because at that point in time I had become very consumed with the art and science of driving so it was finally fascinating to me to watch these fine men driving the best cars to the limit.
From there on out my love of the sport only became more and more vicious. I spent the off season(s) reading tons of my dad's many books on F1 from the 60's and 70's and discovered the F1 web pages I still check first thing in the morning to this day. I started my own F1 book collection as I love the old school as much as the new school. I would poach my pops' books, buy new ones when I could find them at my local book shop, and buy ones online that while expensive, I felt I must have.
On top of raiding my dad's files and growing my own collection of books, and hours of internet reading I would watch the previous seasons races during the winter months because in 2003 I started recording EVERY race weekend and Formula 1 Decade and ANY other bit of F1 related material that came on TV.
From watching the previous seasons races during the winter I grew to love the American F1 commentators immensely. I remember when a Steve Matchett one day appeared on the broadcasts along with Mr. Hobbs & company. Matchett was so technical and business oriented that it threw me because he was so well informed and had so much insight. I was used to the other guys being efficient and lighthearted but this fellow just presented the facts and knew what he was talking about so intricately. It took a few races for me to warm to the man but now I don't know what I would do should he not call the races. Between Matchett, the wonderfully colorful and amusing David Hobbs & good old Bob Varsha I can no longer fully enjoy a race with out them. At times I have had to watch European coverage due to VCR malfunctions and it was just not the same. Those three men make F1 that much more interesting for me and are honestly the only reason I am so adamant about catching the Friday practices. We all know that not a whole hell of a lot happens during those practice sessions some times, but I derive a great amount of enjoyment hearing Hobbs, Matchett, Varsha, and Windsor just shooting the shit that Friday practice is an event for me. While I do enjoy qualifying the only reason I make sure to tune in at the top of the sessions is to hear them, as we all know the real action happens in the last 2 minutes of Q3 any how.
It is funny how the fellows who call your races can make such an impact on the overall viewing experience. The first time I realized this strongly was when Speed Channel would lose races to CBS and my three guys wouldn't be calling the races. I remember watching the last 15 laps or so of a thrilling San Marino GP in 2005 muted because the guys calling the race were angering me so much. You couldn't listen to them. They were atrocious. If "my guys" had been calling the race those last laps would have been just amazing. I was so pissed that I wrote a letter to CBS voicing my distaste. I appreciated that they were trying to bring a bigger American audience to Formula 1 (and more fine American dollars to Mr. Ecclestone's bulging bank account) but at the same time explained that if they had had Hobbs, Matchett & Varsha that people would be even more receptive. Eventually the races stopped being on CBS and instead on Fox, when not on Speed and thankfully we got our announcers back. I like to think my letter helped. It didn't. But I still like to think it did...
But that wasn't the first time I realized how much "your guys" meant to the overall viewing experience. It all originally clicked with me and made sense one day when some really good racing was going on and that new Matchett guy was getting excited. When he gets excited the man gets an aggressive, very British tone about him when truly stirred and that in turn made me even more excited about what was transpiring since I knew that if Matchett was really excited that it was the real deal. From that point onward I realized why people were so sad when Murray Walker retired. As a newbie AND an American I never really heard him call races but after spending a lot of money on bootleg DVD's of vintage seasons and hearing him I realized that he was the voice of British F1 viewers and to many, his voice was all they knew. He was a part of the family. Like a cousin or uncle.
The guys who call the races that you watch make up such an important part of the show. You figure on average, if you watch all the Friday, Saturday, and Sunday events that you are hearing "your guys" talk for almost 80 hours a year.
Think about that.
So in the end I would like to thank my father, that shitty trip to Illinois back in 2002, Niki Lauda, Michael Schumacher and the announcers on Speed's F1 broadcasts for all helping me discover my love of Formula 1 Racing.
Thanks guys!
Once I pinpointed the race in question (French GP, Magny-Cours, July 21, 2002) I started thinking about the few people that really enjoy this blog all over the world and how the reason they come here is for my silly take on things. I'm not a news source. I'm not terribly technical. I am an opinionated American that some folks find amusing due to my semi-skewed take on Formula 1.
Once upon a time I was supposed to be an up and coming young F1 journalist years ago but apparently I was too old even at the time to win the Red Bull journalism prize (by 1 year) that I felt I needed to help get my career kick-started and at the same time I have yet to fulfill my Journalism/Mass Communications degree at the ripe old age of 28... So as you can see life got in the way and as of late I have forgot to update this blog as much as I should be doing. But in the end I sure do love to write about Formula 1 racing and the things that captivate and amuse me about the sport both new and old.
That is why this blog exists. That is the same reason there are only a handful of the many web pages devoted to F1 that are worth reading that DO serve as a news source. This blog exists to amuse, provoke some though and possibly educate. I don't break news. I'm not going to be able to explain very well why some teams were soiling themselves at the beginning of this past season over the double diffusers some other teams had. There are plenty of people who can do that well and plenty more people who aspire to.
Formula 1 at times can be kind of cold and soulless. I like to latch on to that bit of warmth that the sport does emit and discuss that aspect. With that said, I shall try to get back to my "roots" and tell more stories of how F1 has touched me as well as parody and lampoon the other aspects that I find absurd for the enjoyment of the few fine loyal readers I do have... starting this entry!
I learned 10 years ago as a young intern at Alternative Press magazine here in Cleveland that publishers don't get too excited over creative writing exercises involving humor concerning whatever subject it is that their publication "seriously" covers, but many readers can be and ARE entertained by such bits of nonsense. Who doesn't like entertainment?
With that said, I shall tell my eye-opening Formula 1 experience and elaborate on it a bit. I would greatly enjoy reading what your F1 eye-opener was.
The Tale:
It was early August in 2002. I had just arrived home from a 3 day trip to Peoria, Illinois and was kind of pissed off as a whole due to the person I was traveling with and the fact that we hit massive traffic delays about 50 miles south of arriving home which added an extra hour to an already long enough road trip. It was around midnight when I finally arrived home. My father was watching TV and drinking a glass of scotch as he often does. The old man was real excited because he'd found a channel that showed F1 races regularly.
Now, my dad has been a pretty devout follower of Formula 1 since the late 1960's when a buddy of his in college took him up to Watkins Glen for some racing action and evenings of drinking. He went to all the US GP's at The Glen from 1973 to 1980. In 1976 he first won tickets to the inaugural Long Beach Grand Prix from Formula Magazine. He had his father who worked at the local General Electric in Erie, PA make him up some "official" looking credentials that stated he was a Team Lotus photographer and was able to get into the paddock and on to the starting grid to take some amazing pictures of drivers and famous folk, on top of being able to get some great Super 8 film by hanging off of the barriers manned by a track marshal for drivers to enter through should they need to get past the catch-fencing and concrete barriers in the event of a failure or crash. Later that year he and my mother went to the race at Mosport In Canada. Then, in 1981 I was born. My birth caused him to have to give up wandering around the USA & Canada to watch F1 races. It also sadly caused him to have to quit racing in the SCCA's Formula Vee series. To make matters worse, my need for Pampers was so fierce that he had to sell his beautiful 1969 Lotus Europa which had aided him in the procurement of 3 SCCA Autocross championships in the mid-1970's. With my bottom covered in diapers with money received from selling relics of his youth he was still able to make it to two more GP's due to his employment with Phillip Morris. In 1982 and 1983 he scored some great tickets to the Grand Prix of Detroit, which sadly were the last races he has attended.
Since then he had always kept up with F1 via magazines and any races shown on TV. He named me after Niki Lauda and as a small child would try to educate me in the ways of F1. While I was too young to really understand I was always well aware of the names Stirling Moss, Jim Clark, Jackie Stewart, James Hunt, Emerson Fittipaldi, and of course Niki Lauda. I would play with his expensive small scale F1 replica cars and that was about it. I always had an appreciation and respect for the sport but due to it being hard to see in the states, never really started following it... until that fateful night in August of 2002 when the Speed Channel was replaying a recent race in the wee hours of the morning.
I remember just arriving back home and during a commercial my pops telling me how he was pretty sure a Michael Schumacher was about to surpass Juan Manuel Fangio's record of world championships that Schumi & Fangio up to that race currently shared. While my dad was familiar with the Schumacher name, I sure was not but this information was enough for me to at least sit down and watch the last half of the race. I found it interesting because at that point in time I had become very consumed with the art and science of driving so it was finally fascinating to me to watch these fine men driving the best cars to the limit.
From there on out my love of the sport only became more and more vicious. I spent the off season(s) reading tons of my dad's many books on F1 from the 60's and 70's and discovered the F1 web pages I still check first thing in the morning to this day. I started my own F1 book collection as I love the old school as much as the new school. I would poach my pops' books, buy new ones when I could find them at my local book shop, and buy ones online that while expensive, I felt I must have.
On top of raiding my dad's files and growing my own collection of books, and hours of internet reading I would watch the previous seasons races during the winter months because in 2003 I started recording EVERY race weekend and Formula 1 Decade and ANY other bit of F1 related material that came on TV.
From watching the previous seasons races during the winter I grew to love the American F1 commentators immensely. I remember when a Steve Matchett one day appeared on the broadcasts along with Mr. Hobbs & company. Matchett was so technical and business oriented that it threw me because he was so well informed and had so much insight. I was used to the other guys being efficient and lighthearted but this fellow just presented the facts and knew what he was talking about so intricately. It took a few races for me to warm to the man but now I don't know what I would do should he not call the races. Between Matchett, the wonderfully colorful and amusing David Hobbs & good old Bob Varsha I can no longer fully enjoy a race with out them. At times I have had to watch European coverage due to VCR malfunctions and it was just not the same. Those three men make F1 that much more interesting for me and are honestly the only reason I am so adamant about catching the Friday practices. We all know that not a whole hell of a lot happens during those practice sessions some times, but I derive a great amount of enjoyment hearing Hobbs, Matchett, Varsha, and Windsor just shooting the shit that Friday practice is an event for me. While I do enjoy qualifying the only reason I make sure to tune in at the top of the sessions is to hear them, as we all know the real action happens in the last 2 minutes of Q3 any how.
It is funny how the fellows who call your races can make such an impact on the overall viewing experience. The first time I realized this strongly was when Speed Channel would lose races to CBS and my three guys wouldn't be calling the races. I remember watching the last 15 laps or so of a thrilling San Marino GP in 2005 muted because the guys calling the race were angering me so much. You couldn't listen to them. They were atrocious. If "my guys" had been calling the race those last laps would have been just amazing. I was so pissed that I wrote a letter to CBS voicing my distaste. I appreciated that they were trying to bring a bigger American audience to Formula 1 (and more fine American dollars to Mr. Ecclestone's bulging bank account) but at the same time explained that if they had had Hobbs, Matchett & Varsha that people would be even more receptive. Eventually the races stopped being on CBS and instead on Fox, when not on Speed and thankfully we got our announcers back. I like to think my letter helped. It didn't. But I still like to think it did...
But that wasn't the first time I realized how much "your guys" meant to the overall viewing experience. It all originally clicked with me and made sense one day when some really good racing was going on and that new Matchett guy was getting excited. When he gets excited the man gets an aggressive, very British tone about him when truly stirred and that in turn made me even more excited about what was transpiring since I knew that if Matchett was really excited that it was the real deal. From that point onward I realized why people were so sad when Murray Walker retired. As a newbie AND an American I never really heard him call races but after spending a lot of money on bootleg DVD's of vintage seasons and hearing him I realized that he was the voice of British F1 viewers and to many, his voice was all they knew. He was a part of the family. Like a cousin or uncle.
The guys who call the races that you watch make up such an important part of the show. You figure on average, if you watch all the Friday, Saturday, and Sunday events that you are hearing "your guys" talk for almost 80 hours a year.
Think about that.
So in the end I would like to thank my father, that shitty trip to Illinois back in 2002, Niki Lauda, Michael Schumacher and the announcers on Speed's F1 broadcasts for all helping me discover my love of Formula 1 Racing.
Thanks guys!
Friday, December 18, 2009
There better be a triumphant return...
I was very pleased to read that my new main man, Kamui Kobayashi, found a decent ride and has signed for the recently revived Sauber sans BMW team. I look forward to his fun style of racing and possibly pissing off smooth kings of driving like World Champ J. Button.
Other than that I am as "over the moon" as little old Bernie Ecclestone is with all the stories I continue to read about Michael Schumacher's supposed return to F1 with Mercedes GP. When you are reading stories with Luca di Montezemolo talking about how in his eyes it is Schumacher's "twin" that will be racing for the Silver Arrows next season you can only assume gears are turning and Schumi really is on the verge of coming back.
I just love it!
If Schumacher does in fact return to the grid I wonder if Jenson Button will be kicking himself in the ass for not staying with Brawn... if it was a challenge he was really after.
While very few will debate that Lewis Hamilton is a great driver who will win more championships in the future, even fewer will debate that Michael Schumacher is a force of racing nature.
If Button wanted a same-machine challenge going head to head with Schumacher would have been the wisest choice on his part considering he apparently wants to be chewed up and spat out by his team mate. While I am rather confident Lewis will not have much of a problem doing this to JB, Schumacher would humiliate Button in a way that Max Mosley has to pay to receive.
I understand the main reason Schumacher is being poached is because Mercedes GP want to start their re-introduction to F1 with a beastly German super-team, on top of having the means and will to procure such a talent. If this were still Brawn GP there would be far less of a chance they'd be knocking on Schumi's door, even after letting their champion go to McLaren and their old reliable saunter on over to the Williams pasture to graze. Maybe they would? Maybe Schumacher would still have come back had the team been Brawn and not Mercedes? I don't know.
All I do know is I am excited to see Schumacher either live up to his fans expectations of a come back or fail miserably. I also know if after achieving world champion status if the next step in Button's personal career path was to try to go head to head in the same car with someone he deemed to be a worthy adversary that Michael Schumacher is the man to try to prove something against.
Other than that I am as "over the moon" as little old Bernie Ecclestone is with all the stories I continue to read about Michael Schumacher's supposed return to F1 with Mercedes GP. When you are reading stories with Luca di Montezemolo talking about how in his eyes it is Schumacher's "twin" that will be racing for the Silver Arrows next season you can only assume gears are turning and Schumi really is on the verge of coming back.
I just love it!
If Schumacher does in fact return to the grid I wonder if Jenson Button will be kicking himself in the ass for not staying with Brawn... if it was a challenge he was really after.
While very few will debate that Lewis Hamilton is a great driver who will win more championships in the future, even fewer will debate that Michael Schumacher is a force of racing nature.
If Button wanted a same-machine challenge going head to head with Schumacher would have been the wisest choice on his part considering he apparently wants to be chewed up and spat out by his team mate. While I am rather confident Lewis will not have much of a problem doing this to JB, Schumacher would humiliate Button in a way that Max Mosley has to pay to receive.
I understand the main reason Schumacher is being poached is because Mercedes GP want to start their re-introduction to F1 with a beastly German super-team, on top of having the means and will to procure such a talent. If this were still Brawn GP there would be far less of a chance they'd be knocking on Schumi's door, even after letting their champion go to McLaren and their old reliable saunter on over to the Williams pasture to graze. Maybe they would? Maybe Schumacher would still have come back had the team been Brawn and not Mercedes? I don't know.
All I do know is I am excited to see Schumacher either live up to his fans expectations of a come back or fail miserably. I also know if after achieving world champion status if the next step in Button's personal career path was to try to go head to head in the same car with someone he deemed to be a worthy adversary that Michael Schumacher is the man to try to prove something against.
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Glock's gut...
I just read a little story about Timo Glock saying his gut feeling is that Michael Schumacher is going to come back to F1 racing. I hope his gut is right and knows something my gut does not.
Monday, December 14, 2009
How nice...
I find it pleasant to read that Ferrari will supposedly not cock-block Michael Schumacher if he decides to return to kicking ass and taking names in F1 for Mercedes GP. That is honorable.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Edge of seat announcement... or not?
So it looks quite likely that tomorrow the Lotus name in F1 will be revived with two guys I like quite a bit but always let me down. Of course I am talking about the speed demon of qualifying and slow poke of the race as well as being owner of the thickest neck in F1, Mr. Jarno Trulli. Purportedly the other man is a fellow with whom I share a birthday and is the proud owner of the biggest head (physically, not metaphorically) in Formula 1, Finland's sole Fin left in the sport (as of the time of this writing) Mr. Heikki Kovalainen.
I am excited, as I am a vintage Lotus F1 lover. I can now proudly wear my old brass Lotus belt buckle not just as a fan of their fine ugly little road cars but also as a Formula 1 team enthusiast. While I don't expect much out of the team I do hope they aren't the slowest of the lot next year. I would like to bequeath that honor to Virgin F1 because Richard Branson is a cheap-ass-rich-man-hippie. I actually like Branson just fine but hope he gets what he pays for as he got lucky last year sponsoring the underdog as he so often likes to state.
Now what I really would appreciate the most of all things F1 related would be a statement released by Mercedes GP or the Michael Schumacher camp that was notarized by a notary public declaring either he has in fact been released from contract by Ferrari, declared fit by a doctor to race, and has indeed signed a new 1 year contract to race Mercedes super all German Nazi rocket sleighs OR can not get out of his Ferrari contract, is still not fit to race, and no longer cares to think about racing F1 cars any longer.
Just give me one or the other. I don't want to wait any more. I've already been teased by a Schumi return once this year and gotten over it. Stop dangling this frotting carrot in front of my face already!
I am excited, as I am a vintage Lotus F1 lover. I can now proudly wear my old brass Lotus belt buckle not just as a fan of their fine ugly little road cars but also as a Formula 1 team enthusiast. While I don't expect much out of the team I do hope they aren't the slowest of the lot next year. I would like to bequeath that honor to Virgin F1 because Richard Branson is a cheap-ass-rich-man-hippie. I actually like Branson just fine but hope he gets what he pays for as he got lucky last year sponsoring the underdog as he so often likes to state.
Now what I really would appreciate the most of all things F1 related would be a statement released by Mercedes GP or the Michael Schumacher camp that was notarized by a notary public declaring either he has in fact been released from contract by Ferrari, declared fit by a doctor to race, and has indeed signed a new 1 year contract to race Mercedes super all German Nazi rocket sleighs OR can not get out of his Ferrari contract, is still not fit to race, and no longer cares to think about racing F1 cars any longer.
Just give me one or the other. I don't want to wait any more. I've already been teased by a Schumi return once this year and gotten over it. Stop dangling this frotting carrot in front of my face already!
Thursday, November 19, 2009
We've got interest now!
According to Bloomberg, Daimler and Aabar are paying around $184.2m for 75.1% of Brawn GP making the saviors of Honda's F1 team an immense chunk of coin. You do the math. How amazing it was that a sub-par team called Honda decided to quit F1 after spending a great amount of time and money developing what would end up being the strongest car for pretty much the first half of the season.
Instead of putting all those people who worked so hard for the team out on their asses they sold the team to Ross Brawn and company for a British pound sterling and THEN financed that season for them with the understanding that "You get one free year and then it is up to you to make this work and if you don't then it is your conscience that has to deal with making all these people jobless"
This ultimately led to the newly named/birthed Brawn GP who went on to sew up the constructors championship AND the drivers race as well in only their first year, something that had never happened before and to top it all off it was the team's only year... and on somebody else's dime!!!
If that wasn't a good enough of a story now they've gone and flipped the frotting team for $184.2 million dollars because Mercedes wanted to have more say in how an F1 team was run as well as not having much interest in financing a team that will soon be producing supercars that will challenge their own works?
I do recall an earlier entry at the end of March where I proclaimed "Ross Brawn may be Jesus Christ" and I'm beginning to think I was right. Making crappy bloated teams into dual, lean championship winners and then selling the team for a tidy pile of money... a lot like turning water in to wine if you think about it, but with a capitalistic lean.
Instead of putting all those people who worked so hard for the team out on their asses they sold the team to Ross Brawn and company for a British pound sterling and THEN financed that season for them with the understanding that "You get one free year and then it is up to you to make this work and if you don't then it is your conscience that has to deal with making all these people jobless"
This ultimately led to the newly named/birthed Brawn GP who went on to sew up the constructors championship AND the drivers race as well in only their first year, something that had never happened before and to top it all off it was the team's only year... and on somebody else's dime!!!
If that wasn't a good enough of a story now they've gone and flipped the frotting team for $184.2 million dollars because Mercedes wanted to have more say in how an F1 team was run as well as not having much interest in financing a team that will soon be producing supercars that will challenge their own works?
I do recall an earlier entry at the end of March where I proclaimed "Ross Brawn may be Jesus Christ" and I'm beginning to think I was right. Making crappy bloated teams into dual, lean championship winners and then selling the team for a tidy pile of money... a lot like turning water in to wine if you think about it, but with a capitalistic lean.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Brawny Mercedes
Norb Haug is apparently hinting at some sort of "surprise" in the form of driver line up and thus people are talking about Michael Schumacher coming back to drive for the silver arrows as he has purportedly given up F1 counseling duties with Ferrari and is supposedly just working with the development of road cars. However, I always thought the reason Ferrari was giving Schumacher these contracts over the past three years was to keep him legally bound to the team till he was too old to go driving any more and thus not any kind of competition threat to them any more, which is when he would really be allowed to fully retire.
Don't get me wrong, that would be awesome if Schumacher ditched Ferrari and hooked up with his old mate Ross Brawn and drove a Nazi rocket sleigh around F1 tracks. That would be gold. Especially if he won!
In the end it would be far more than a simple surprise if M. Schumacher came back to F1 driving a Mercedes. I have a feeling Haug's surprise is Kimi Raikkonen. Now that WOULD be a surprise. Getting rid of a cheap Button for an expensive Kimi.
Whatever. I wish them all the best in their new teams... and surprise me with a Schumacher of the non Ralf variety.
Don't get me wrong, that would be awesome if Schumacher ditched Ferrari and hooked up with his old mate Ross Brawn and drove a Nazi rocket sleigh around F1 tracks. That would be gold. Especially if he won!
In the end it would be far more than a simple surprise if M. Schumacher came back to F1 driving a Mercedes. I have a feeling Haug's surprise is Kimi Raikkonen. Now that WOULD be a surprise. Getting rid of a cheap Button for an expensive Kimi.
Whatever. I wish them all the best in their new teams... and surprise me with a Schumacher of the non Ralf variety.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
They only care about Jenson Button and Nick Heidfeld's fucking stupid beards...
Ok... Button & Heidfeld's stupid shit beards and poor old Tom Pryce's viscous demise. Those three things are what drive traffic to this fine, proud, and often times humorous Formula One blog. I will go down in the annals of Formula One history as the guy that analyzed the facial hair trends of F1. I'm not even finished yet. For the past year or two I've been wanting to put together a somewhat definitive piece on facial hair through out F1's years I just have not had the time to compile it the way I would like.
It is unfortunate that as soon as the season ends I have time to write about the sport. I don't quite get it other than the fact that my life as a whole quiets down during the late fall and that as soon as Formula One is over and done with I start to pine for it and feel the need to speak about it in an effort to quench my thirst for F1 action.
I sit here with my autographed picture of the late Ronnie Peterson's beautiful Lotus looking down upon me proud of the fact that I may never find the means and the way to become a "proper" Formula One journalist but at least I can amuse people from time to time and that they know where to go when curious about Jenson Button or Nick Heidfeld's facial hair.
It is unfortunate that as soon as the season ends I have time to write about the sport. I don't quite get it other than the fact that my life as a whole quiets down during the late fall and that as soon as Formula One is over and done with I start to pine for it and feel the need to speak about it in an effort to quench my thirst for F1 action.
I sit here with my autographed picture of the late Ronnie Peterson's beautiful Lotus looking down upon me proud of the fact that I may never find the means and the way to become a "proper" Formula One journalist but at least I can amuse people from time to time and that they know where to go when curious about Jenson Button or Nick Heidfeld's facial hair.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Toyodor
Well, it is 2am round about now and I keep reading very loud whispers about Toyota pulling out of F1 with immediate effect and just closing the team down. Not selling it. No nothin'. Just game over.
I'm bummed in a sense since Toyota looked like they were making some progress. I had always hoped they'd secure at least one win... but doesn't look like that is going to happen now.
Honestly, I probably wouldn't even really give a fiddler's fart about it all had stupid Timo Glock not skinned his knee and vertebrae and opened the door for that loveable and adorable ragamuffin Kamui Kobayashi to go racing.
I have absolutely no 100% solid reason as to why this guy amuses me as much as he does, other than the fact that he's pissed off Button and driven hard in his two races and managed to pick up some points quite quick. I just hope the guy has found a few supporters inside the F1 circle and can hopefully land a ride with one of the new teams.
Hell... Sauber's probably got a seat open now that they are a team again saying they had a provisional spot and now that Toyota's about to call it a day. Come on Peter Sauber. Kamui Kobayashi is worth a shot. This incarnation of Sauber wouldn't even be stepping up to go racing had Toyota not just pulled out.
However, for all I know the management at Toyota were just saying Kobayashi would get the drive next year since they knew their team was toast. Trying to do The Kob a favor, raising his stock.
Either way, I hope Mr. Kobayashi finds a ride next year. Obviously the guy has made a good impression on me and I am very suspicious of Japanese F1 drivers in general. They never seem to deliver... yet this guy has my attention for some reason.
Lastly, I'm glad Max Mosley's prediction of the manufacturers making a semi mass exodus is finally coming true. As crazy and stupid as some folks thought Mad Max was, you can't say the guy didn't know what he was talking about even if the reason the manufacturers are leaving are for different reasons than Mosley predicted. Or not.
Max probably didn't expect to be on his way out with the manufacturers however I am glad he had the foresight to get the costs lowered and get Cosworth back.
I'm bummed in a sense since Toyota looked like they were making some progress. I had always hoped they'd secure at least one win... but doesn't look like that is going to happen now.
Honestly, I probably wouldn't even really give a fiddler's fart about it all had stupid Timo Glock not skinned his knee and vertebrae and opened the door for that loveable and adorable ragamuffin Kamui Kobayashi to go racing.
I have absolutely no 100% solid reason as to why this guy amuses me as much as he does, other than the fact that he's pissed off Button and driven hard in his two races and managed to pick up some points quite quick. I just hope the guy has found a few supporters inside the F1 circle and can hopefully land a ride with one of the new teams.
Hell... Sauber's probably got a seat open now that they are a team again saying they had a provisional spot and now that Toyota's about to call it a day. Come on Peter Sauber. Kamui Kobayashi is worth a shot. This incarnation of Sauber wouldn't even be stepping up to go racing had Toyota not just pulled out.
However, for all I know the management at Toyota were just saying Kobayashi would get the drive next year since they knew their team was toast. Trying to do The Kob a favor, raising his stock.
Either way, I hope Mr. Kobayashi finds a ride next year. Obviously the guy has made a good impression on me and I am very suspicious of Japanese F1 drivers in general. They never seem to deliver... yet this guy has my attention for some reason.
Lastly, I'm glad Max Mosley's prediction of the manufacturers making a semi mass exodus is finally coming true. As crazy and stupid as some folks thought Mad Max was, you can't say the guy didn't know what he was talking about even if the reason the manufacturers are leaving are for different reasons than Mosley predicted. Or not.
Max probably didn't expect to be on his way out with the manufacturers however I am glad he had the foresight to get the costs lowered and get Cosworth back.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
The Kob
I like Kamui Kobayashi. He is goofy looking. He smiles a lot. He gives entertaining and candid interviews and most important he is a balsy, aggressive driver... but doesn't appear to be a "crazy" or "wild" driver like I always felt Takuma Sato was. Hopefully he will get a drive with Toyota next year. Hopefully Toyota will still be in F1 next year.
Earlier today I was reading some articles about who goes where next year. The topic of USF1 was brought up, how they want to promote American drivers yet there are no Americans currently holding a superlicense. I figure Scott Speed probably still has a superlicense. Do they expire? I mean he only got shitcanned from Toro Rosso a year and a half ago. However, maybe the article I was reading meant that any American that USF1 is mildly interested in does not have a superlicense. I suppose that is fine considering old Scott Speed says "I hardly even follow Formula One any more". He's content to keep driving those big old NASCAR shitboxes around ovals while Red Balls foots the bill. I can't say I completely blame him I suppose... though I'd still follow F1.
Earlier today I was reading some articles about who goes where next year. The topic of USF1 was brought up, how they want to promote American drivers yet there are no Americans currently holding a superlicense. I figure Scott Speed probably still has a superlicense. Do they expire? I mean he only got shitcanned from Toro Rosso a year and a half ago. However, maybe the article I was reading meant that any American that USF1 is mildly interested in does not have a superlicense. I suppose that is fine considering old Scott Speed says "I hardly even follow Formula One any more". He's content to keep driving those big old NASCAR shitboxes around ovals while Red Balls foots the bill. I can't say I completely blame him I suppose... though I'd still follow F1.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Abu Dhabi's Yas Marina - A New Wave band...
I was somewhat skeptical of the new track in Abu Dhabi. I expected it to be beautiful but boring. The track is in fact beautiful and I surprisingly find the course interesting. How it folds in on itself at first kind of bugged me but after watching practice for awhile I found it was interesting since it appears to be pretty intense from the drivers standpoint going through all of those slow corners on the brake off the brake constantly changing gears and so forth. So in the end I am excited about the race in Abu Dhabi. Maybe now we can get rid of Bahrain's course with something a little more interesting. That track is so flippin' boring in every conceivable way!
OK. That's all I've got now unfortunately...
OK. That's all I've got now unfortunately...
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Button Lipped
I almost felt bad for ripping into Button's ass yesterday about monetary disputes when I read an article that he was only looking for $8 million but then I realized it wasn't a dollar sign by the 8 and instead that of the pound sterling. While £8 million still isn't totally ridiculous in F1 circles, especially for a newly crowned world champion... I still don't feel bad.
He got paid quite well all those years Honda were giving him shitty cars. He should give back. Receive a few paltry millions as opposed to many and just get on with it, his dream of being the first Briton to ever win back to back world championships. If he pulls that off, then he'll have more of a right to flat out demand money. Until then he should just be happy he's in a good car with a good team.
He got paid quite well all those years Honda were giving him shitty cars. He should give back. Receive a few paltry millions as opposed to many and just get on with it, his dream of being the first Briton to ever win back to back world championships. If he pulls that off, then he'll have more of a right to flat out demand money. Until then he should just be happy he's in a good car with a good team.
Friday, October 23, 2009
The Nervous Ferret Rides Again!
I'm not sure how I feel about Jean Todt becoming the new president of the FIA. While I expected him to win, I am surprised at how badly he kicked Ari Vatanen's ass.
If Button does leave Brawn over money issues and joins McLaren or something I'll be kind of offended and surprised. He says racing is not about money but at the same time apparently feels he is not paid well enough. He should join Toyota. I'm sure they'll pony up 20 or 30 million to him and he can not win and be more rich. It would be nice if Toyota one day built a F1 car that was good and had a driver capable of taking it to victory.
If Button does leave Brawn over money issues and joins McLaren or something I'll be kind of offended and surprised. He says racing is not about money but at the same time apparently feels he is not paid well enough. He should join Toyota. I'm sure they'll pony up 20 or 30 million to him and he can not win and be more rich. It would be nice if Toyota one day built a F1 car that was good and had a driver capable of taking it to victory.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
How depressing...
So I get all excited thinking Schumacher is going to come back and drive around, thus making me happy, even if he wasn't winning all the time. Then that doesn't happen. That really pissed me off. I would have liked to see the lap times he did testing the old Ferrari as I give it a 50/50 chance that it really was his neck bugging him on long hauls or that he'd lost a bit more speed than he thought. Who knows. I was quite surprised at how poorly Luca Badoer showed.
While I was really bummed Schumi didn't rise from the retired and that Badoer was shitty, I must say I thought it very cute Ferrari signed Turdsy Fisichella. Now, I've never been a huge fan of Fisi, and have actually been wishing he would just leave F1 now for a few years, I do have a soft spot for the guy. I remember in 2003 or 2004 when when he was out of a drive with either Jordan or Sauber that I read a story on Yahoo about Turdsy wanting to drive a Ferrari. It was absolutely pathetic and schmaltzy. But now he is a driver for Ferrari and can go away at the end of the season. So I guess it is a win-win.
Now we've got the whole Renault thing. We'll discuss that soon.
While I was really bummed Schumi didn't rise from the retired and that Badoer was shitty, I must say I thought it very cute Ferrari signed Turdsy Fisichella. Now, I've never been a huge fan of Fisi, and have actually been wishing he would just leave F1 now for a few years, I do have a soft spot for the guy. I remember in 2003 or 2004 when when he was out of a drive with either Jordan or Sauber that I read a story on Yahoo about Turdsy wanting to drive a Ferrari. It was absolutely pathetic and schmaltzy. But now he is a driver for Ferrari and can go away at the end of the season. So I guess it is a win-win.
Now we've got the whole Renault thing. We'll discuss that soon.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
It is a great shame... but still great!
Michael gets the call on his scarlet "Schumifone" and after quickly ducking into the nearest public toilet he emerges and is ready to save the day and make millions of super sad little Ferrari fans happy once again. Schumacher himself will now prove that either the F60 is in fact a pig, or that he really is as good as some say!
While it truly is a great shame that something like this had to happen in order to get Michael Fucking Schumacher back into the cockpit, it is still great! When I got home from work and read that Schumacher was returning to help out some old friends I let out a yell that would be likable to one a hillbilly might make if Dale Earnhardt himself rose from the dead.
That picture of Felipe makes me so damn sad though. Poor old Massa. When I saw the footage I had to leave the room cos a tear came to my eye. Kinda like back in 2004 when Ralfie Schumacher ate shit so badly into that wall at Indianapolis. That was the first time I was ever scared watching an F1 race. When I saw this actual picture, I was even more upset than when I saw him catch that spring to the head. If that thing had been caught any lower our little Felipe would no doubt be dead and that would be even worse than is the case now.
When Lauda made the mention that Schumacher was the only real choice for Ferrari, I entertained it for like 2 seconds and decided that it would never happen and that Lauda was just saying his normal off the wall shit (albeit always with a grain of truth) just to ruffle some feathers. Then I started secretly yearning for it to become a reality. Then yet again I realized it just wouldn't happen... so when I saw the story on GrandPrix.com I almost tossed my cookies with excitement.
While nobody wanted to see Massa hurt, I bet the guy just gained a million new fans because I know I am not the only one who has missed Schumi the past 2.5 years.
I'm so glad Michael has a month to train and am truly excited to see him back racing, if only for a little while.
Kick some ass Schumacher.
Get Well Massa
annnnnnnnnd...I don't even care about BMW pulling out of the sport any more.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Vettelstone
There were some good dices today during the race. It was nice to see Ferrari not totally sucking. The Red Balls seem to be working nicely with their new additions. Old Seb Vet made it look easy out there.
I truly hope that Donington Park fails in a way. I like Silverstone. A lot. Even if Silverstone does have to take a break eventually I'd still rather see the British GP at Brands Hatch as opposed to Donighton... but whatever.
I'm sad it will be another three weeks before the next outing of F1'ing.
I truly hope that Donington Park fails in a way. I like Silverstone. A lot. Even if Silverstone does have to take a break eventually I'd still rather see the British GP at Brands Hatch as opposed to Donighton... but whatever.
I'm sad it will be another three weeks before the next outing of F1'ing.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Interesting and/or scary
This is all getting really weird. I have no clue what is going on. I hope in the end Max Mosley pisses off and agrees to retire like he is supposed to. I hope Bernard Ecclestone stops being a greedy wrinkly old pixie and gives the teams some more money and stops setting up new races in places for the sake of money and not motorsport. I'm tired of those two old knobs! While I respect both greatly for what they have done for Formula Juan Racing over the past few decades they both need to go away now and enjoy their money elsewhere.
This is about not taking shit offa no one. This is a revolution. I hope it all works out and all ends on paper as it has all started on paper. Hopefully everything will right itself... but I'm kind of nervous. Max Mosley is starting to remind me of a rabid crazy old dog which is quite unsettling. It is like he's nothing left to lose so he's just going to keep being more and more of a twat.
Maybe this is a conspiracy to destroy F1 legally as we know it. Maybe Max, Bernie, and the teams are all in on it... or else this really is just an absurd power struggle. One or the other though.
Either way, it looks like war?
I listen to BBC World News at night when I go to sleep. Something about those proper British voices talking about depressing world events just lulls me to sleep. Even though F1 is FAR more popular overseas than in the US, I still always get excited when they talk about F1 on Sunday nights after a race. Usually they just tell you the top 3 results and play a little interview blurb of the winner... so last night I was quite surprised to hear that the 8 FOTA teams have decided to break away from F1. Especially since they mentioned the breakaway about 4 times an hour for two hours and sometimes would give detailed versions of what happened which I appreciated since I wanted nothing more than to get up and hop on the internet, which obviously was not an option at 3am.
Usually I'm on top of my F1 news but I moved 2 weeks ago and have yet to get cable/internet/phone set up in my apartment so I only get to read up on F1 news every few days when I swing by my folks house.
So I was truly surprised and nervous when the BBC told me what was going on.
This is about not taking shit offa no one. This is a revolution. I hope it all works out and all ends on paper as it has all started on paper. Hopefully everything will right itself... but I'm kind of nervous. Max Mosley is starting to remind me of a rabid crazy old dog which is quite unsettling. It is like he's nothing left to lose so he's just going to keep being more and more of a twat.
Maybe this is a conspiracy to destroy F1 legally as we know it. Maybe Max, Bernie, and the teams are all in on it... or else this really is just an absurd power struggle. One or the other though.
Either way, it looks like war?
I listen to BBC World News at night when I go to sleep. Something about those proper British voices talking about depressing world events just lulls me to sleep. Even though F1 is FAR more popular overseas than in the US, I still always get excited when they talk about F1 on Sunday nights after a race. Usually they just tell you the top 3 results and play a little interview blurb of the winner... so last night I was quite surprised to hear that the 8 FOTA teams have decided to break away from F1. Especially since they mentioned the breakaway about 4 times an hour for two hours and sometimes would give detailed versions of what happened which I appreciated since I wanted nothing more than to get up and hop on the internet, which obviously was not an option at 3am.
Usually I'm on top of my F1 news but I moved 2 weeks ago and have yet to get cable/internet/phone set up in my apartment so I only get to read up on F1 news every few days when I swing by my folks house.
So I was truly surprised and nervous when the BBC told me what was going on.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
FOTA Feets in Mouth
While I understand why some teams/manufactures do not want a puny tiny silly budget capped two-tiered series I also found it hard to believe that they all weren't going to sign up for the 2010 season. While it is hard to imagine a F1 with out Ferrari is is also hard to imagine Ferrari competing in any other series but F1 as its main outlet of competition... so I was not too worried about Ferrari leaving. I don't think anybody really was. I'm not saying it couldn't and won't happen but some thing very foul would have to be a-foot, or happen to cause such a thing to occur.
Another thing I found interesting from lightly reading comments left on news stories regarding Williams breaking ranks and signing up for the 2010 season before the other FOTA teams did were all the people giving Williams a hard time about what they did. All the big manufactures don't need to be in F1. They are in the series to sell cars by competing well. Other teams are there to sell energy drinks as well as for the spirit of competition. Williams is there to do nothing but race and attempt to win. McLaren is practically owned by Mercedes and Ron Dennis is looking to start making more super cars. Ferrari will always sell cars no matter what. Toyota, Renault, & BMW are just there to attempt to move more road car units. Dietrich Mateschitz and his two teams exist because the dude has more money than he knows what to do with and loves racing, plus it probably helps move a few more cans of Red Bull for him. Same deal with Vijay Mallya of Force India. Has a lot of money, likes racing, brands cars with his products.
WilliamsF1: They go racing. That is it. So why give them shit for signing up for F1 in 2010? They've got nowhere else to go and nothing else to do.
I hope the FIA and the FOTA can find a common ground concerning budgets. It would be nice to see some new and competitive teams come into the fold, but everybody has to be competing against the same set of rules. That much is a fact.
Another thing I found interesting from lightly reading comments left on news stories regarding Williams breaking ranks and signing up for the 2010 season before the other FOTA teams did were all the people giving Williams a hard time about what they did. All the big manufactures don't need to be in F1. They are in the series to sell cars by competing well. Other teams are there to sell energy drinks as well as for the spirit of competition. Williams is there to do nothing but race and attempt to win. McLaren is practically owned by Mercedes and Ron Dennis is looking to start making more super cars. Ferrari will always sell cars no matter what. Toyota, Renault, & BMW are just there to attempt to move more road car units. Dietrich Mateschitz and his two teams exist because the dude has more money than he knows what to do with and loves racing, plus it probably helps move a few more cans of Red Bull for him. Same deal with Vijay Mallya of Force India. Has a lot of money, likes racing, brands cars with his products.
WilliamsF1: They go racing. That is it. So why give them shit for signing up for F1 in 2010? They've got nowhere else to go and nothing else to do.
I hope the FIA and the FOTA can find a common ground concerning budgets. It would be nice to see some new and competitive teams come into the fold, but everybody has to be competing against the same set of rules. That much is a fact.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Interesting F1 searches...
With no real drive to do anything productive this morning I decided to waste time and poke around one of pages that keeps stats on this blog and see how some people were finding this page. There were a few interesting searches that brought people to this fine Formula One blog.
The favorite search was "jenson button beard" which has led peoples to my page at least 10 times in the past month. Last year the winner was Nick Heidfeld and his beard. This year Jense is storming all aspects of the F1 world!
The only other search that came back multiple times was "lauda jokes" which was searched three different times over the past 4 weeks by at least two people.
Here are some other searches:
"video did not the death of the old devil"
"usa f1 ecclestone"
"usgpe"
"usgpe contacts"
"blogspot superass"
"michael fucking schumacher"
"mclaren's devil horn"
"nicke lauda"
"the wee scot stewart"
"scott speed lashes franz tost"
"nick lauda senna's"
"punishmax"
"sex in nazi camp"
"frank william on myspace"
...and then there is my favorite:
"my big dick"
How about all that?
The favorite search was "jenson button beard" which has led peoples to my page at least 10 times in the past month. Last year the winner was Nick Heidfeld and his beard. This year Jense is storming all aspects of the F1 world!
The only other search that came back multiple times was "lauda jokes" which was searched three different times over the past 4 weeks by at least two people.
Here are some other searches:
"video did not the death of the old devil"
"usa f1 ecclestone"
"usgpe"
"usgpe contacts"
"blogspot superass"
"michael fucking schumacher"
"mclaren's devil horn"
"nicke lauda"
"the wee scot stewart"
"scott speed lashes franz tost"
"nick lauda senna's"
"punishmax"
"sex in nazi camp"
"frank william on myspace"
...and then there is my favorite:
"my big dick"
How about all that?
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Ross Brawn may be Jesus Christ...
Brawn said his magic wouldn't take hold until his second year at Honda and boy-howdy did it ever! The man aren't no liar! Just goes to show if you give a mediocre driver a good car they can do good shit with it!
As I am a Barichello fan I was pulling for him to do well and was absolutely appalled at that turd of a start he had to the race. I almost got angry at him, but the old goat proved he still has some fight in him as well as proved the Brawn GP car could take a lickin' and keep on tickin' as he got into quite a handful of melees during the race!
I was also impressed with the pace of the Red Balls car, Vettel holding down the fort till the end of the race when he got over protective and took himself and the Koob out. As much as I pull for Vettel, I can't say I wasn't clapping my hands and talking shit to him/the TV after he fouled up. I've got the hand the kid some credit for him immediately getting onto the radio and taking full blame for the incident, though he need not call himself an idiot. He's just a passionate young racer... but I wasn't heartbroken as the Vettel/Koob incident brought my old friend Rubens back into P2 and I was secretly hoping for that.
Until his run in with Vettel I was also very impressed with Kubica's performance. The guy did a good race and proved that he is in fact a great racer. Heidfeld and his beard are worthless and the only reason he's still with BMW is the fact that he's a Kraut.
Hamilton did a hell of a job too, hanging in there and charging up to 4'th place.
As a Toyota owner I was happy to see Truli slot into P3 due to perseverance and good luck (my Toyota is named Jarno, after Truli). When picking my Fantasy F1 guys I almost went with Truli but decided to go with less likely choices. Only Heidfeld proved me wrong, though that wasn't a surprise to me.
The Ferrari's came off as plain pathetic. That's it.
Overall I must give props to Brawn GP, the Toyota drivers whom both started from pit lane and finished P3 & P5, as well as old Lewis Hamilton who started from the dead end of the grid.
I was right... this year's race was better than the last and for the exact right reasons. I'm surprised the FIA pulled these rule changes off with out having them hamper the race and flopping all over the floor making the sport look bad and boring.
Good job to all!
As I am a Barichello fan I was pulling for him to do well and was absolutely appalled at that turd of a start he had to the race. I almost got angry at him, but the old goat proved he still has some fight in him as well as proved the Brawn GP car could take a lickin' and keep on tickin' as he got into quite a handful of melees during the race!
I was also impressed with the pace of the Red Balls car, Vettel holding down the fort till the end of the race when he got over protective and took himself and the Koob out. As much as I pull for Vettel, I can't say I wasn't clapping my hands and talking shit to him/the TV after he fouled up. I've got the hand the kid some credit for him immediately getting onto the radio and taking full blame for the incident, though he need not call himself an idiot. He's just a passionate young racer... but I wasn't heartbroken as the Vettel/Koob incident brought my old friend Rubens back into P2 and I was secretly hoping for that.
Until his run in with Vettel I was also very impressed with Kubica's performance. The guy did a good race and proved that he is in fact a great racer. Heidfeld and his beard are worthless and the only reason he's still with BMW is the fact that he's a Kraut.
Hamilton did a hell of a job too, hanging in there and charging up to 4'th place.
As a Toyota owner I was happy to see Truli slot into P3 due to perseverance and good luck (my Toyota is named Jarno, after Truli). When picking my Fantasy F1 guys I almost went with Truli but decided to go with less likely choices. Only Heidfeld proved me wrong, though that wasn't a surprise to me.
The Ferrari's came off as plain pathetic. That's it.
Overall I must give props to Brawn GP, the Toyota drivers whom both started from pit lane and finished P3 & P5, as well as old Lewis Hamilton who started from the dead end of the grid.
I was right... this year's race was better than the last and for the exact right reasons. I'm surprised the FIA pulled these rule changes off with out having them hamper the race and flopping all over the floor making the sport look bad and boring.
Good job to all!
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Brawny & The Killer B's
I have a feeling this season is going to be even better than last season. I'd like to say that this upcoming race is going to be better than last seasons, but I doubt that in the sense of all the failure and unpredictability of the previous season opener. I'm still wowed by the massive amount of failure and epic destructiveness of that race. It would be quite pleasant if this race was as exciting but for different reasons.
It was VERY nice to see the two Brawn GP cars qualify 1 & 2 today. I was hoping old Barrichello would win pole, but maybe there's a tiny chance he can win the race. I'd like to see that old dog win 1 more race before he retires.
Either way, I hope the Brawns score a 1-2 tomorrow as on Monday I decided just for the hell of it to set my Fantasy F1 choices as the two Brawn cars (and Nick Heidfeld for further giggles) and Brawn as the constructor for winners.
As always the first GP of the year is always a doozy but this year it might not be just because people are driving wild.
I wonder how the guys in the board room at Honda feel about this, as they paid for this car but no longer have the branding.
For some reason I almost felt bad for Ferrari and McLaren. I don't know why, but I did. I'm glad they are lagging behind, but still, I sort of feel for them though they will bounce back soon enough to their "rightful" places I assume.
Not that these thoughts to follow are of much news or surprise to any F1 fan but I was amazed at the lack of performance from McLaren & Ferrari. I had a feeling they weren't going to be on the first two rows, but I did not foresee the Ferrari's in P7 & P9 and was really flabbergasted to see the McLaren's in P14 & P15.
While it was said Hamilton's car suffered a problem, the way the SpeedTV team announced it was that "He lost all drive" as the reason he didn't even go out in Q2. While I knew they didn't mean in the metaphorical sense, it still made me laugh, thinking if he had "lost all drive" and decided the weekend was a throw away.
I'm not happy about the race starting so late for a few reasons: A) Even as a TV spectator all the shadows suck. I can only imagine how lame it must be for the drivers. B) They moved the race to a later time to help the European TV viewers out yet now for me to be able to watch it live, the damn race won't even start till 2am. This isn't really a problem for me as it is 553am as I write this and I've yet to go to sleep, but the principal of it all irks me. I liked it better when it started at 11pm or midnight or whenever it did last year.
Some other things that caught me by surprise were the semi-lack of performance from Williams and Toyota (the other "rogue diffuser" teams). After all the hubub I figured at least one driver from each team would be in P3 & P4. However we have a Red Bull & a BMW. Interestingly none of the guys in P1 thru P4 are running KERS on their car which I also found curious.
Anyhow, as with last year's Melbourne grid, this year's grid is fantastic and even better than the 2008 grid!!! I do look forward to the madness that will ensue!
It was VERY nice to see the two Brawn GP cars qualify 1 & 2 today. I was hoping old Barrichello would win pole, but maybe there's a tiny chance he can win the race. I'd like to see that old dog win 1 more race before he retires.
Either way, I hope the Brawns score a 1-2 tomorrow as on Monday I decided just for the hell of it to set my Fantasy F1 choices as the two Brawn cars (and Nick Heidfeld for further giggles) and Brawn as the constructor for winners.
As always the first GP of the year is always a doozy but this year it might not be just because people are driving wild.
I wonder how the guys in the board room at Honda feel about this, as they paid for this car but no longer have the branding.
For some reason I almost felt bad for Ferrari and McLaren. I don't know why, but I did. I'm glad they are lagging behind, but still, I sort of feel for them though they will bounce back soon enough to their "rightful" places I assume.
Not that these thoughts to follow are of much news or surprise to any F1 fan but I was amazed at the lack of performance from McLaren & Ferrari. I had a feeling they weren't going to be on the first two rows, but I did not foresee the Ferrari's in P7 & P9 and was really flabbergasted to see the McLaren's in P14 & P15.
While it was said Hamilton's car suffered a problem, the way the SpeedTV team announced it was that "He lost all drive" as the reason he didn't even go out in Q2. While I knew they didn't mean in the metaphorical sense, it still made me laugh, thinking if he had "lost all drive" and decided the weekend was a throw away.
I'm not happy about the race starting so late for a few reasons: A) Even as a TV spectator all the shadows suck. I can only imagine how lame it must be for the drivers. B) They moved the race to a later time to help the European TV viewers out yet now for me to be able to watch it live, the damn race won't even start till 2am. This isn't really a problem for me as it is 553am as I write this and I've yet to go to sleep, but the principal of it all irks me. I liked it better when it started at 11pm or midnight or whenever it did last year.
Some other things that caught me by surprise were the semi-lack of performance from Williams and Toyota (the other "rogue diffuser" teams). After all the hubub I figured at least one driver from each team would be in P3 & P4. However we have a Red Bull & a BMW. Interestingly none of the guys in P1 thru P4 are running KERS on their car which I also found curious.
Anyhow, as with last year's Melbourne grid, this year's grid is fantastic and even better than the 2008 grid!!! I do look forward to the madness that will ensue!
Friday, March 6, 2009
Super Brawn GP & USGPE
How about that... Ross Brawn now is a stakeholder of the old Honda F1 team and now has a F1 team named after him. In all honesty, I didn't see that one actually panning out. I figured for sure a large company of some sort or a Richard Branson would end up buying the team. Good for Brawn and company. Now they just have to make it work!
Another thing that I didn't expect was to see the mighty Rubens Barrichello back in a F1 car either. How fun. While I think Rubens might as well throw in the towel, it is nice to see him back for another season in some way. Not that I'm against Bruno Senna being in F1, but it does make sense for Rubens and Button to team together since they are the most experienced couple on the grid (according to grandprix.com)
I find it funny that when the USF1 team was announced a few weeks back it was mentioned Bernie Ecclestone was all about the idea, yet he then made them change the name to USGPE standing for US GP Engineering. That just irks me since FOM doesn't even own the F1 name. Way to help out the little guy Bernie. The team had to tack on "engineering" to the name since Tony George is thought to own the rights to USGP, even though he doesn't currently have a USGP to run.
Gah!
Another thing that I didn't expect was to see the mighty Rubens Barrichello back in a F1 car either. How fun. While I think Rubens might as well throw in the towel, it is nice to see him back for another season in some way. Not that I'm against Bruno Senna being in F1, but it does make sense for Rubens and Button to team together since they are the most experienced couple on the grid (according to grandprix.com)
I find it funny that when the USF1 team was announced a few weeks back it was mentioned Bernie Ecclestone was all about the idea, yet he then made them change the name to USGPE standing for US GP Engineering. That just irks me since FOM doesn't even own the F1 name. Way to help out the little guy Bernie. The team had to tack on "engineering" to the name since Tony George is thought to own the rights to USGP, even though he doesn't currently have a USGP to run.
Gah!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Superass
I am so sick of the F1 drivers bitching about their superlicense fees! I am a very fucking good driver, taught by a former 3 time consecutive auto cross champion who was a SCCA nationally licenced driver who also professionally drove in Formula Vee and am myself professionally licensed to teach in most of the states in The United States of America the art and science of driving to people of any age, sex, creed, etc... and I'm pretty sure I could artfully scare (in a good way) many of the people reading this blog with my mastery of driving were I driving a 1996 Ford, a 2005 GM, a Lotus, or a Ferrari... My goal in life is to test drive cars and write articles about said cars and test drive Bridgestone tires. I will probably never be paid a small fee to do either and I'm a fucking good driver and would be happy to make my living driving competitively. Sure, I'd be unhappy about the man taking some, be it in license fees and/or taxes due to the absorbent amount of money I made driving in circles for a shitload of money with other professionally licensed drivers... but ya know what? I'd live with it.
I professionally teach people how to drive. People who don't know how to drive well, on roads full of licensed drivers who also don't know how to drive well either and that's a lot more fucking dangerous than me and a bunch of other professionally licensed drivers making a shitload of money to compete for a dickload of cash driving in circles in cars built to sustain life after heavy crashes. I have a better chance of dying in my profession than Fernando Alonso does. I can statistically prove it right now: Senna died in 1994 driving an F1 car. It is 2009 now. Nobody has died driving an F1 car since 1994. In 2007 41,000 people died driving just on United States highways alone. So eat a dick. I made $27,000 last year.
Fuck you.
I've spent 75,000 miles on US roads teaching people to drive in the last 2 years alone. I've made roughly $50,000. Somehow I'm not dead. F1 drivers competitively drive about 5000 miles a year tops and make much more than $25K a year on average.
Go to hell!
I think the FIA should give me some of that money that is supposed to go to their "Safe Driving" program to help me keep my car going that I owe $13,000 on and my mouth fed. I teach safe driving. F1 drivers artfully drive in a beautiful way to entertain themselves and millions of other folks around the world. I enjoy it, but you know what, my driving job isn't for personal or others enjoyment. I teach safe, sound, and smart driving technique and as much as I'd like to be able to take all my students around a track to show them how to attack a 3-point corner, I'm just happy if they properly navigate a left turn whilst utilizing their turn signal!
I professionally teach people how to drive. People who don't know how to drive well, on roads full of licensed drivers who also don't know how to drive well either and that's a lot more fucking dangerous than me and a bunch of other professionally licensed drivers making a shitload of money to compete for a dickload of cash driving in circles in cars built to sustain life after heavy crashes. I have a better chance of dying in my profession than Fernando Alonso does. I can statistically prove it right now: Senna died in 1994 driving an F1 car. It is 2009 now. Nobody has died driving an F1 car since 1994. In 2007 41,000 people died driving just on United States highways alone. So eat a dick. I made $27,000 last year.
Fuck you.
I've spent 75,000 miles on US roads teaching people to drive in the last 2 years alone. I've made roughly $50,000. Somehow I'm not dead. F1 drivers competitively drive about 5000 miles a year tops and make much more than $25K a year on average.
Go to hell!
I think the FIA should give me some of that money that is supposed to go to their "Safe Driving" program to help me keep my car going that I owe $13,000 on and my mouth fed. I teach safe driving. F1 drivers artfully drive in a beautiful way to entertain themselves and millions of other folks around the world. I enjoy it, but you know what, my driving job isn't for personal or others enjoyment. I teach safe, sound, and smart driving technique and as much as I'd like to be able to take all my students around a track to show them how to attack a 3-point corner, I'm just happy if they properly navigate a left turn whilst utilizing their turn signal!
Friday, February 13, 2009
USF1
I am very glad to be seeing all of these stories about USF1 in the news recently. This is a good sign. I was worried last week when I saw the first story that it was the only one I would ever see and never again would we hear anything of or about USF1. Hopefully they can keep their momentum and gather funding and get a team going. I wish them the best in their effort to marry F1 and America... for everybody's sake!
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Bernie, Honda, and Senna Jr.
I just read an article on grandprix.com that claims Honda has signed Bruno Senna. I found this odd as up until now, there had been no word on whether the team had been "saved" or not, which would make it a rather curious thing to sign a driver if it is not even known if the team would make the grid for the first race.
Obviously things have been going on behind closed doors because signing a driver to a nonexistent team would be a bad thing on many levels, as I'm sure under the circumstances said driver would probably be able to sue if in fact Honda couldn't go racing, since Senna could have easily signed up for another season in GP2, even though the team he was with last season had to fill his seat... so what I am getting at is obviously things are going on at Honda that we don't know about... so I was not surprised to read further on down the article to see that supposedly none other than Bernard Ecclestone may in fact be involved with keeping the team alive. Grandprix.com went on to explain:
"This would not be a surprise as Ecclestone is keen to make sure that the teams are not unanimous within the Formula One Teams' Association (FOTA) and having a financial interest in one of them is a good way to ensure that this happens.
It is believed that the majority of the money to run the team will be coming from Honda itself as it is cheaper to pay to keep the team alive than it is to lay off all the staff."
Go figure?
Obviously things have been going on behind closed doors because signing a driver to a nonexistent team would be a bad thing on many levels, as I'm sure under the circumstances said driver would probably be able to sue if in fact Honda couldn't go racing, since Senna could have easily signed up for another season in GP2, even though the team he was with last season had to fill his seat... so what I am getting at is obviously things are going on at Honda that we don't know about... so I was not surprised to read further on down the article to see that supposedly none other than Bernard Ecclestone may in fact be involved with keeping the team alive. Grandprix.com went on to explain:
"This would not be a surprise as Ecclestone is keen to make sure that the teams are not unanimous within the Formula One Teams' Association (FOTA) and having a financial interest in one of them is a good way to ensure that this happens.
It is believed that the majority of the money to run the team will be coming from Honda itself as it is cheaper to pay to keep the team alive than it is to lay off all the staff."
Go figure?
Monday, February 9, 2009
Luckily Olivier Panis did not show us 'lil Panis...
While the picture is funny due to the striped underwares, it is a sad picture overall. From the Canadian Grand Prix in 1997 when Olivier Panis crashed his Prost F1 car
While it doesn't look like a horrid crash (if you can find a clip of it on youtube) the poor guy ended up breaking both of his legs and showing the world what his underpants looked like that day.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
An American F1 team?
I just read a curious story on yahoo.com's UK F1 site. The story claims that Peter Windsor who is a veteran F1 journalist who currently works with SpeedTV in the USA as their on-site personality at F1 races as well as formerly working as Team Manager for Ferrari and Williams back in the 80's and early 1990's has partnered with IndyCar technical and design guru Ken Anderson and are planning a Formula One team to be called "USF1" which would showcase American drivers and technology in Formula One. It is said the team may be based in Charlotte, North Carolina which is the heart of NASCAR country with a possible second location in Europe.
Apparently the idea was hatched at the 2008 Canadian GP and it is said that good old Bernie Ecclestone has no objections to the venture (which is always a good thing).
It has been noted that Ken Anderson may be one of the people interested in purchasing the Honda F1 team and was last attempting to purchase Honda's other cast-away team Super Aguri last year... so the guy is pretty serious about getting into F1, which is always a good sign. Coupled with the fact that the guy has a background in racing design (and not just being an ex-race driver like many failed team heads are) and is working with a great mind such as Peter Windsor whom I greatly respect has me quite giddy right now and I honestly do hope to see USF1 on the grid in 2010 or 2011. That would be fantastic! Hopefully this isn't a fluke. I'd like to see this project come to fruition!
And for today's F1 Puerile MS Paint pic:
Apparently the idea was hatched at the 2008 Canadian GP and it is said that good old Bernie Ecclestone has no objections to the venture (which is always a good thing).
It has been noted that Ken Anderson may be one of the people interested in purchasing the Honda F1 team and was last attempting to purchase Honda's other cast-away team Super Aguri last year... so the guy is pretty serious about getting into F1, which is always a good sign. Coupled with the fact that the guy has a background in racing design (and not just being an ex-race driver like many failed team heads are) and is working with a great mind such as Peter Windsor whom I greatly respect has me quite giddy right now and I honestly do hope to see USF1 on the grid in 2010 or 2011. That would be fantastic! Hopefully this isn't a fluke. I'd like to see this project come to fruition!
And for today's F1 Puerile MS Paint pic:
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
What this picture of Frank Williams says to me...
While I am pretty sure Sir Frank has never actually strung the words "Eat-a-Dick" together, as he is a far too elegant and proper man... that is what this picture says to me. It is what I imagine him saying to somebody given his pose in the picture as well as the look of contempt on his face. This could have been taken shortly after BMW informed Sir Frank they would no longer be working with them?
Tom Pryce: A Welshman who drove like a Welshman!
I just read an interesting little bit on grandprix.com about a memorial being built to the dearly departed Welshman Tom Pryce who died in a horrific accident at the age of 27 during the 1977 South African Grand Prix. I remember the first time I saw the footage of Tom Pryce's death. It was rough.
Pryce hit a 19 year old track marshal running across the track at approximately 170mph, throwing the marshal high up into the air and more or less tearing the body apart in the mean time in a diagonal fashion in the torso area. It is seriously a foul foul site. The track marshal was carrying a big assed 40 pound fire extinguisher which hit Pryce in the helmet, pushing the helmet as a whole upwards and ultimately partially decapitating the poor Welshman.
The accident is so horrid that it had ended up on "Faces of Death" videos and crap like that over the years. I showed a friend the accident once on youtube (where you can see Tom Pryce & a track marshal die and Budd Dywer blow his fucking head off, but you can't see a bare titty) because he was curious and he told me upon seeing it "They showed that accident over and over and over again on a huge screen at a Slayer concert I was at back in the 1990's"
Never thought I'd be able to find a way for F1 and heavy metal to become friends.
Check out the Tom Pryce memorial thingy as well!
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Why is Sir Jackie always pointing at Emo?!
For the past two years or so I have not been terribly good about harvesting current F1 photos during the season for some reason. I still blame it on Michael Schumacher, as ever since he left I'm just not as bat-shit about F1 as I used to be. I don't know why, since the past two seasons have been really great... Idol worship? I don't know? But there really aren't any living Gods in F1 currently. Give it time, sure, but as of now, just a bunch of kick ass youngins. Lewis Hamilton is well on his way, and while he has won my heart, he hasn't done enough yet to call him God... but I'm sure he will eventually.
Anyhow, with nothing better to do in the midnight hours I decided to go hunting for F1 photos from the past season or two and I curiously came across a photo from the Italian GP 2008 of Sir Jackie Stewart pointing his finger at Emerson Fittipaldi which has an amazing likeness to a photo from 35 years ago.
Stewart & Emo 1973:
Emo & Stewart 2008:
Why you always pointing at Fittipaldi, Sir Jackie???? Ya wee Scot bastard!
Anyhow, with nothing better to do in the midnight hours I decided to go hunting for F1 photos from the past season or two and I curiously came across a photo from the Italian GP 2008 of Sir Jackie Stewart pointing his finger at Emerson Fittipaldi which has an amazing likeness to a photo from 35 years ago.
Stewart & Emo 1973:
Emo & Stewart 2008:
Why you always pointing at Fittipaldi, Sir Jackie???? Ya wee Scot bastard!
Formula Drugs
Pictured is former F1 Williams and McLaren driver Juan Pablo Montoya. As a native Colombian he naturally has a nose for sniffing out cocaine. I'm not insinuating JPM was or is a cocaine user, it was just an easy joke due to the picture and him being from Colombia and all... Interestingly no Formula One driver has ever been busted for any kind of drugs, performance enhancing or recreational by random FIA drug testing. Tomas Enge tested positive for marijuana in 2002 after winning the F3000 championship, a year after he did 3 odd GP's with the Prost F1 team but other than that... nothing. The reason I decided to look into the matter was I was talking to somebody about good old James Hunt (F1 Champ 1976) the other day and that got me to thinking, as that dude liked to party. He was an alcoholic and openly enjoyed smoking a spliff as well as a bump of cocaine here and there. To calm his nerves before races it has been said by some that he would have a beer or two early in the day.
The only modern racer that comes close to Hunt-esque acts is Kimi Raikkonen, whom interestingly entered and won a snowmobile race in his native Finland under the assumed name "James Hunt". Räikkönen has openly admired the lifestyles of 1970s race car drivers such as Hunt.
Soon (in the next month or two) I will be unveiling my first new driver biography in a year or two, on the one and only James Hunt.
With that said, I will leave you with a vintage Hunt interview:
Classic!
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Fifty Four More
I'm glad to see that the FIA is doing away with the horrendous closing of pit lane nonsense this coming season. That rule pissed me off so much. In theory, I understood the rationale, however, I did not like the penalization of cars that had to come in or else their race would be over due to lack of fuel, as calamity always seemed to strike during pit windows. I understand the threat of penalty was to dissuade cars from quickly leaping in to the pits to take advantage of whatever the current situation was. Even that never sat well with me. The closing of pit lane always seemed like a tampering of potential race results plain and simple. If a team were able to change strategy quickly due to unforeseen circumstances to benefit their cause, I say all the better. It never felt fair to restrict such things. I understand this whole rule was supposedly put in place to keep cars from "racing" back to the pits in haste under a safety car, thus keeping the track a safer place for all. Just why didn't the FIA think tank come up with the current 2009 rule sooner? It seems to make a mite more sense than just closing the pit lane for X amount of time. While I think I like the new configuration, I won't know until I see it put to use in actual race conditions, however Charlie Whiting seems to make sense when explaining how the new rule will work:
“The only difference is we intend to implement a minimum time back to the pits. When we deploy the safety car, the message will go to all the cars, which will then have a “safety car” mode on their ECUs. As soon as that message gets to the car, it’ll know where it is on the circuit, and it’ll calculate a minimum time for the driver to get back to the pits. The driver will have to respect this and the information will be displayed on his dashboard."
That seems to make a whole hell of a lot more sense than the old rule... whether this current rule sucks or not... just in theory the new rule sucks less than the old rule. However, instead of making the driver "respect" the information they are given, why not just make a limiter like the pit lane speed limiter button the drivers have. If the ECU can figure out where the car is on the track, and calculate the minimum time to get back to the pits why not just add one extra step and have the little fucker figure out the speed the car needs to go to get to the pits in the time the FIA would like the car to get there and voom. The driver doesn't have to worry about respecting anything other than the road ahead of him, there is no rushing to the pits... I mean why not just go all the way FIA?
Going back to the old rule one last time before it is forever put to bed: I always wondered why there wasn't a provision that if the teams could quickly provide proof to race control that there was no other option than to pit due to lack of fuel that a penalty would not have to be issued, especially to cars/teams that had nothing to do with the causing of the safety car to be deployed in the first place... as those F1 cars have so many damn sensors on them that I'm sure proof could have been provided quickly. Either way, that stupid old rule is gone so I need not muse on it any further.
Lastly... I have completed a new batch of doctored F1 photos for my famous "Formula One Paint" series of puerile humor:
More to follow in the coming days and weeks!
“The only difference is we intend to implement a minimum time back to the pits. When we deploy the safety car, the message will go to all the cars, which will then have a “safety car” mode on their ECUs. As soon as that message gets to the car, it’ll know where it is on the circuit, and it’ll calculate a minimum time for the driver to get back to the pits. The driver will have to respect this and the information will be displayed on his dashboard."
That seems to make a whole hell of a lot more sense than the old rule... whether this current rule sucks or not... just in theory the new rule sucks less than the old rule. However, instead of making the driver "respect" the information they are given, why not just make a limiter like the pit lane speed limiter button the drivers have. If the ECU can figure out where the car is on the track, and calculate the minimum time to get back to the pits why not just add one extra step and have the little fucker figure out the speed the car needs to go to get to the pits in the time the FIA would like the car to get there and voom. The driver doesn't have to worry about respecting anything other than the road ahead of him, there is no rushing to the pits... I mean why not just go all the way FIA?
Going back to the old rule one last time before it is forever put to bed: I always wondered why there wasn't a provision that if the teams could quickly provide proof to race control that there was no other option than to pit due to lack of fuel that a penalty would not have to be issued, especially to cars/teams that had nothing to do with the causing of the safety car to be deployed in the first place... as those F1 cars have so many damn sensors on them that I'm sure proof could have been provided quickly. Either way, that stupid old rule is gone so I need not muse on it any further.
Lastly... I have completed a new batch of doctored F1 photos for my famous "Formula One Paint" series of puerile humor:
More to follow in the coming days and weeks!
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Cap in yo' ass!
While I have my doubts as to whether or not salary caps are ever going to become a reality in Formula One, I am all for it, so long as the caps aren't too low, as these drivers do deserve a filthy amount of money, just not an absurd amount. Can't cap it too low, or else they won't be able to pay for their superlicences!
One of the reasons I am for a cap is because I think it will honestly help the spectacle of the sport. While this may not make a load of sense right off the bat think about somebody like Ralf Schumacher. I think he had a $20 million retainer at Toyota and did nothing for the team other than enjoy their dollars. He no longer goes racing in F1 because he wasn't worth that kind of money. I can't remember exact figures but I think Truli was only being paid $3 million to $7 million. He still races for Toyota, even though he doesn't do too much either. He at least doesn't demand dumb amounts of money.
My point is, if there is a ceiling to salary's, the driver market will become much more competitive. I feel you would see more new drivers in the sport and less lifers who are around for no good reason other than to collect a fat pay check. New drivers could move up, while others moved out.
People would race harder to either secure their position or to prove they are worth more, which would thus make on track action more enjoyable... and now is the time, since supposedly these 2009 cars are stripped down enough to make passing feasible, I think a salary cap would make everybody that much hungrier to race their asses off as opposed to do just enough. The back of the grid could become fun once again.
Below are a list of guys that didn't need to be in Formula One even in 2008:
Barrichello has been around since 1993. I love & respect Rubens... but the curtain has closed. I don't care that M. Schumacher was his team mate for many years. Yeah, Ferrari gave team orders. We all know that, but I strongly doubt that even if they did not that Schumi would not have triumphed all the same. We probably won't be seeing him again.
Fischichella has been around since 1996. Turdsy has never done anything worth while. He won a race in 2003 due to not crashing. Won 2 additional races when with Renault, compared to his team mate's 14 during the same period. I don't care that his team mate was Fernando Alonso. They were driving the same car.
Trulli has been around since 1997. He won Monaco in 2004 and it was a well deserved win. Other than that, eh? Sure, I know he hasn't been in great cars, but the guy has never seemed to run well over entire race distances. He should retire and become a test driver because he does have speed, but usually only over the course of a few laps.
Heidfeld has been around since 2000. What has he done since then? Nothing, other than bring the beard back to F1, which is a noble pursuit, but has done nothing for his overall speed. Plus, he talks like a German Elmer Fudd. Suck it up. The Schumacher Brothers didn't speak like that. He's only been on the podium 11 times out of 150 starts. Go away. If he doesn't perform VERY well this year, he should be gone... and if he isn't then BMW is stupid.
Button has been around since 2000. I can't feel sorry for Button. He's been touted as the new British hope for so many years. Luckily for the British Lewis Hamilton came along and actually came thru on that promise. Button had one good year: 2004, where he finished top 3 ten different times and ended the season "best of the rest" behind Ferrari. Button would probably be racing this year had he just gone to Williams back in 2005, as Williams has sucked the past 4 years and he probably could have continued to hold a seat at Williams just due to the fact that Williams knew they weren't making that great of cars, thus just keeping the same drivers out of respect for their sub-par cars. It is a shame, as I have a feeling that Williams are going to have a very good car this year. We probably won't see Button this year. Maybe we will. I don't know, but if he never comes back to F1 again I won't really miss him.
Webber has been hanging about since 2002. I like Mark Webber a lot and I know he has been in shitty cars his whole career. But still. His first race, the 2002 season opener in his native Australia he finished 5'th for Minardi. That was his best finish until May of 2005. He has been on the podium twice. Maybe this season will prove different. If Webbo doesn't impress this year, I vote him out of the fraternity.
So let's cap some salaries? It won't hurt any body, and it might just do some good?
One of the reasons I am for a cap is because I think it will honestly help the spectacle of the sport. While this may not make a load of sense right off the bat think about somebody like Ralf Schumacher. I think he had a $20 million retainer at Toyota and did nothing for the team other than enjoy their dollars. He no longer goes racing in F1 because he wasn't worth that kind of money. I can't remember exact figures but I think Truli was only being paid $3 million to $7 million. He still races for Toyota, even though he doesn't do too much either. He at least doesn't demand dumb amounts of money.
My point is, if there is a ceiling to salary's, the driver market will become much more competitive. I feel you would see more new drivers in the sport and less lifers who are around for no good reason other than to collect a fat pay check. New drivers could move up, while others moved out.
People would race harder to either secure their position or to prove they are worth more, which would thus make on track action more enjoyable... and now is the time, since supposedly these 2009 cars are stripped down enough to make passing feasible, I think a salary cap would make everybody that much hungrier to race their asses off as opposed to do just enough. The back of the grid could become fun once again.
Below are a list of guys that didn't need to be in Formula One even in 2008:
Barrichello has been around since 1993. I love & respect Rubens... but the curtain has closed. I don't care that M. Schumacher was his team mate for many years. Yeah, Ferrari gave team orders. We all know that, but I strongly doubt that even if they did not that Schumi would not have triumphed all the same. We probably won't be seeing him again.
Fischichella has been around since 1996. Turdsy has never done anything worth while. He won a race in 2003 due to not crashing. Won 2 additional races when with Renault, compared to his team mate's 14 during the same period. I don't care that his team mate was Fernando Alonso. They were driving the same car.
Trulli has been around since 1997. He won Monaco in 2004 and it was a well deserved win. Other than that, eh? Sure, I know he hasn't been in great cars, but the guy has never seemed to run well over entire race distances. He should retire and become a test driver because he does have speed, but usually only over the course of a few laps.
Heidfeld has been around since 2000. What has he done since then? Nothing, other than bring the beard back to F1, which is a noble pursuit, but has done nothing for his overall speed. Plus, he talks like a German Elmer Fudd. Suck it up. The Schumacher Brothers didn't speak like that. He's only been on the podium 11 times out of 150 starts. Go away. If he doesn't perform VERY well this year, he should be gone... and if he isn't then BMW is stupid.
Button has been around since 2000. I can't feel sorry for Button. He's been touted as the new British hope for so many years. Luckily for the British Lewis Hamilton came along and actually came thru on that promise. Button had one good year: 2004, where he finished top 3 ten different times and ended the season "best of the rest" behind Ferrari. Button would probably be racing this year had he just gone to Williams back in 2005, as Williams has sucked the past 4 years and he probably could have continued to hold a seat at Williams just due to the fact that Williams knew they weren't making that great of cars, thus just keeping the same drivers out of respect for their sub-par cars. It is a shame, as I have a feeling that Williams are going to have a very good car this year. We probably won't see Button this year. Maybe we will. I don't know, but if he never comes back to F1 again I won't really miss him.
Webber has been hanging about since 2002. I like Mark Webber a lot and I know he has been in shitty cars his whole career. But still. His first race, the 2002 season opener in his native Australia he finished 5'th for Minardi. That was his best finish until May of 2005. He has been on the podium twice. Maybe this season will prove different. If Webbo doesn't impress this year, I vote him out of the fraternity.
So let's cap some salaries? It won't hurt any body, and it might just do some good?
Monday, January 26, 2009
Whining bastards!
Up until a few years ago it cost like $5 to get your superlicence which is the licence one needs to go racing a Formula One car. Then last year Max Mosley decided to increase the cost by eight to ten times the cost of the previous year. People grumbled as it was a lump sum plus X amount of dollars per point you scored. The front runners were whining about the fact that Force India cars aren't going to have to pay nearly as much as Ferrari or McLaren drivers would. I get the point, it does seem a little lopsided... however I strongly doubt any of the front running whiners would prefer to give up their seat at Ferrari or McLaren, as well as their massive salaries, to go to a team that have cheap superlicences and no chance what so ever of winning races or finishing in the points.
Of course not. Just like poor people don't have to pay as much in taxes as the rich. Sure, yer paying a bit more... but would you rather trade all your riches just so you aren't in such a high tax bracket? No, of course not.
That was 2008. Now it is 2009 and apparently the cost for a superlicence has risen even higher than last year and people are seriously getting pissed. Once again, there are talks of strikes that will never materialize and general pissing and moaning about how broke the FIA is making everybody.
The FIA says the price hike is to keep up with safety standards and such... and we know how much safety our F1 friends demand. So as long as it doesn't come out that Mosley is hoarding this money and spending it on more nasty hookers, I don't see the problem.
Lastly, so long as there are no budget caps in F1 the superlicence system will be somewhat lopsided.
The FIA can't win. You ask for more money for safety purposes you get poo-poo'ed. In an effort to cut costs you limit the amount a team can spend for the services of a driver. You get yelled at.
What to do? What to do?
While I feel F1 drivers should be rewarded handsomely for what they do, they already are. A salary cap is not going to make anybody poor. I am all for a salary cap and a one price for all superlicence.
Of course not. Just like poor people don't have to pay as much in taxes as the rich. Sure, yer paying a bit more... but would you rather trade all your riches just so you aren't in such a high tax bracket? No, of course not.
That was 2008. Now it is 2009 and apparently the cost for a superlicence has risen even higher than last year and people are seriously getting pissed. Once again, there are talks of strikes that will never materialize and general pissing and moaning about how broke the FIA is making everybody.
The FIA says the price hike is to keep up with safety standards and such... and we know how much safety our F1 friends demand. So as long as it doesn't come out that Mosley is hoarding this money and spending it on more nasty hookers, I don't see the problem.
Lastly, so long as there are no budget caps in F1 the superlicence system will be somewhat lopsided.
The FIA can't win. You ask for more money for safety purposes you get poo-poo'ed. In an effort to cut costs you limit the amount a team can spend for the services of a driver. You get yelled at.
What to do? What to do?
While I feel F1 drivers should be rewarded handsomely for what they do, they already are. A salary cap is not going to make anybody poor. I am all for a salary cap and a one price for all superlicence.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Bourdais!!!!!!!!!!!!
So it is not confirmed yet, but I have been reading what I have been hoping to read for months: which is that Sebastian Bourdais will be granted a second season in F1 via the semi-shitty Ferrari powered Toro Rosso. This is good news, as Bourdais deserves a second season in F1. If Red Bull kicked him out after losing Vettel to their main team they would be stupid assholes.
Seb Bourdais is a fucking 4 time Champ Car champion. Ok, so it is American open wheel racing and he raced with Newman-Haas team, but still, 4 successive championships is not an easy feat, American open wheel or not.
Ok, Bourdais had some trouble acclimating to the turdy TR car. Doesn't make him a bad driver and unless one finds another future champion/front runner such as young Vettel, Toro Rosso would be stupid to shitcan Bourdais. That guy can drive a fucking car and I respect him... and not just cos I hunted him down and got his autograph at the 2005 Cleveland GP of Champ Car. The guy can drive! I respect him a lot. Sure, he is a bit old, but he wouldn't have been given a chance if he wasn't solid... so let the old fuck race in a shitty team.
Let up. He'll do well, put him in a BMW and he'd challenge Kubica more than fucking Schtick Nick. Fuck that old has-been turd.
Leave Bourdais alone. He'll get the job done and make Buemi look like a bitch. Just watch.
You non-believing fuckers.
Watch. We got a lot of races in stripped down cars that are starting to be a lot like Bourdais' Champ Car rides.
Eat on a dick.
Seb Bourdais is a fucking 4 time Champ Car champion. Ok, so it is American open wheel racing and he raced with Newman-Haas team, but still, 4 successive championships is not an easy feat, American open wheel or not.
Ok, Bourdais had some trouble acclimating to the turdy TR car. Doesn't make him a bad driver and unless one finds another future champion/front runner such as young Vettel, Toro Rosso would be stupid to shitcan Bourdais. That guy can drive a fucking car and I respect him... and not just cos I hunted him down and got his autograph at the 2005 Cleveland GP of Champ Car. The guy can drive! I respect him a lot. Sure, he is a bit old, but he wouldn't have been given a chance if he wasn't solid... so let the old fuck race in a shitty team.
Let up. He'll do well, put him in a BMW and he'd challenge Kubica more than fucking Schtick Nick. Fuck that old has-been turd.
Leave Bourdais alone. He'll get the job done and make Buemi look like a bitch. Just watch.
You non-believing fuckers.
Watch. We got a lot of races in stripped down cars that are starting to be a lot like Bourdais' Champ Car rides.
Eat on a dick.
Just a note...
I just sent an email to Google which ended in "fuck you"
This means that this blog may be deleted because Google are a bunch of cocksuckers.
So be warned.
I hate Google.
But that is another story.
Seriously though, fuck Google.
I'm looking forward to this F1 season.
P.S. Fuck Google
This means that this blog may be deleted because Google are a bunch of cocksuckers.
So be warned.
I hate Google.
But that is another story.
Seriously though, fuck Google.
I'm looking forward to this F1 season.
P.S. Fuck Google
Monday, January 12, 2009
Wonder
I just got a look at the new Ferrari F60 and it is a pretty car with out all the aerodynamic shit cluttering the vehicle up. It looks like a mean little red racing machine, though it would be nice from an aesthetic point if the front and rear wings were bigger... but if it helps make the racing more kick ass then I don't really give a toss.
With that said I got to thinking about old Kimi Raikkonen. He had a pretty weak year in 2008. Some say he lost motivation and all that. Maybe he did. Maybe the car didn't suite him. In my mind Kimi is a very raw racer and I sometimes wonder if the direction the car was built in somehow hindered his style. It was all so much about aerodynamics and little wing-dings all over the car, I just wonder if it all didn't suite his driving style. One of the main reasons I have a suspicion of this is because Felipe Massa had a much better season but I've never thought too much of his driving. He has never done anything that has made me say "Wow!"
Don't get me wrong, Massa is a solid racer, I just don't think he is all that great and I have a feeling the way the car was built suited him better because I don't think he is all that raw of a racer.
I could be completely wrong here. I don't know. What I do know is I am excited to see how these stripped down cars help racing and I expect to see the rawest talent rise to the top (in terms of impressing, if not winning races and such) while the more marginal drivers really show their mediocrity this coming season.
With that said I got to thinking about old Kimi Raikkonen. He had a pretty weak year in 2008. Some say he lost motivation and all that. Maybe he did. Maybe the car didn't suite him. In my mind Kimi is a very raw racer and I sometimes wonder if the direction the car was built in somehow hindered his style. It was all so much about aerodynamics and little wing-dings all over the car, I just wonder if it all didn't suite his driving style. One of the main reasons I have a suspicion of this is because Felipe Massa had a much better season but I've never thought too much of his driving. He has never done anything that has made me say "Wow!"
Don't get me wrong, Massa is a solid racer, I just don't think he is all that great and I have a feeling the way the car was built suited him better because I don't think he is all that raw of a racer.
I could be completely wrong here. I don't know. What I do know is I am excited to see how these stripped down cars help racing and I expect to see the rawest talent rise to the top (in terms of impressing, if not winning races and such) while the more marginal drivers really show their mediocrity this coming season.
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